Gone Today, Hair Tomorrow!

So I went for my second treatment yesterday! It only took 2 hours as opposed to the almost 5 hours the first one took! Thank God!! But, I have apparently been having some really high blood pressure and we had to stay there for about an hour and a half just to see if it would go down any. It was still high, but low enough that they were okay with sending me home.

My bestie, SA, went with me and as bad as 8 hours running around the hospital sounds we actually fun! One of the most fun things we got to do is I got to pick out my first wig! Or as Dr. Makhoul likes to call it, my Cranial Prosthesis! That it was apparently the medical terminology for a wig is called and he just lost it when he seen it. So to him, it is no longer a wig! HA

I tried on about half a dozen wigs, had one picked out that we like and I spotted another one that just had to try on. We ALL fell in love with it! So here is my first wig:

And what do I look like without it? Well, when I got home last night, I couldn’t stand all the bald spots shining through so I did this:

Yep, I buzzed it all off! You can still see some baldness, so I will keep it covered until I lose the rest of it. I also will have to keep it covered when I’m outside to keep my head from burning too bad!

The only bad news, besides my high blood pressure, is the fact that I have to go BACK to LR this morning for a shot! One stinking shot! I was supposed to get it yesterday, but low and behold, my insurance won’t pay for it until the next day! So I have to take another trip up there for this shot!

I can’t complain too much though, because I want this shot more than anything! It’s called Neulasta! It will keep my levels from dropping so low so I don’t get so sick and end up in the hospital! Praise God that He has given someone the ability to come up with this drug! I sure hope my body takes it well!!!

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

So as much I was hoping it wouldn’t happen, it seems to be. I’m losing my hair! I had cut it awhile back and it was starting to grow out. It was down to my shoulders! So it was a little longer than this:

As much as I was loving this look…it was hard the first time I got in the shower and started pulling long black chunks of hair out! I admit it, I cried…hard! I had to keep telling myself that “I have cancer. One of the things that is gonna help cure me is gonna make my hair fall out. I can deal with that.”

I also have had to keep reminding myself that I am me. My hair doesn’t make me who I am. I can’t let me being bald change who I am and what I know. And I know that ‘they” can take my hair or even my tah tahs, but they can’t take my soul. It’s already taken! I am a child of God and being bald isn’t going to change that!

Yes, I still have to keep reminding myself all of that almost every time I take a shower or look at my pillow or shirt and it’s got more hair on it than not. I will be okay!

So what do I look like now?

Yep, I chopped it all off after that first shower. I couldn’t stand it. I’ve tried different looks with this style, including a faux mohawk, but Sissy didn’t much care for it. I also tried for a messy look, but I can’t seem to just get it right.

My sister, bless her heart, got online and bought me a hair wrap with instructions for me. It came with a plain black scarf and then a head wrap that I just have to tie the back in a bow.

I FINALLY got out to run some errands (after my little stint in the hospital, I was under home lock down!). I decided to try out my new wrap and to be honest…I liked it! It was much better than going without anything or with just a hat. Though today, I may go with just a hat…we shall see.

My next treatment is this Friday. I have to see Dr. Makoul, my medical oncologist, first though and I am excited for him to see that the main tumor they were watching has shrunk! I’m hoping that if one treatment did that, that it also helped with those pesky little infected lymph nodes!!

 

I can do ALL things through Christ, which strengthenth me!

Phil 4:13

1st Treatment and Hospital Stay….long!

Oh my, it’s been awhile. I have been so emotional, and sick, that I haven’t had a chance to update. I decided it was finally time.

My first chemo treatment was April 1. My mom took me to it while Hubby stayed home with the kiddos. I wasn’t really that nervous about it up until the minute it was time to access my port…for the first time!! Thank goodness they had given me some numbing medicine to put over it before hand! (more on that later!!) Once we got back to the treatment room, my friend, MW, showed up to sit with me. I hadn’t seen her in a couple of years so it was nice to catch up with her.

The first medicine they gave me was the Herceptin, because of the HER2+ cancer. I didn’t have any problems with it, or the second one. Not sure which one was what though. I am taking Docetaxel and Carboplatin. The last medicine they gave me started effecting me some what. No allergic reactions, but I felt like a cold rush move through my body, starting at my chest and moving down. I could also feel it pumping in. The nurse came in, said I shouldn’t feel it all and turned the rate down. Much better!

I felt pretty good right afterwards. So much so that my mom and I decided to go to a couple of Christian bookstores to look for me a new Bible. I figured as long of a day has it had been, I would have fallen asleep on the way home. But I didn’t. I felt good.

We got home, and I laid down in the bed. It didn’t take me long before I was asleep for a long nap.

The next day, I was wiped!! Hubby’s stepmom gave over to baby-sit the kids and myself, and I was so glad she did!! I barely remember that day because I slept most of it away. Stepmom took the kids to the park to play, to McDonalds for lunch and ice cream, and then to see the fire truck that my brother-in-law had up at WM for the kids to see.

The rest of the week, I was pretty good. I was a little weak and tired, but not a lot of nausea. I thought, “This is gonna be a smooth ride!” Umm, yeah, didn’t happen!

Thursday, I felt okay, until that evening. I got really sick. My stomach hurt really bad and nothing helped it. I started violently throwing up. I tried to sleep but my stomach just hurt.

Friday I woke up still nauseus, and really weak and tired. I tried making it through the day but about 5pm and just didn’t feel right. I took my temp and it was 100.3! Not good for someone on chemo.

I called Hubby and we were trying to decide what to do when I just decided to call my medical oncologist’s office to see what they said. The on-call doctor said I needed to be checked out because I could have an infection of some sort.

So Hubby came home, my mom came to watch the kids, until my Hubby’s brother and his wife got there to watch them, and off we went to the ER. Before they were able to bring me back, my mom and my aunt who is a RN got there. My aunt went back with me and the tests started.

I had tons of blood drawn, an IV started with fluids going, and some x-rays taken trying to find out what was going on. My white blood cell count (WBCC) was LOW! It was 1.8…the lowest they like it is 4.2! I had an infection somewhere, but they couldn’t find where. They decided to admit me.

All weekend long, they had me on  two high powered broad spectrum antibiotics to just try and get whatever it was gone. Plus they had me on fluids at all times.

On Monday, a new doctor came in, said he wanted to run some more tests and was determined to find a source. By then I had had a couple more fever spikes, but they were starting to go away. He was happy about that!

Tuesday he came in, said that I definitely had a UTI and that I had a touch of H Pylori. Great!!! He said that he wanted to start me on another antibiotic (that’s 3!!) just for the H Pylori. He also said that he wanted to keep me for at least another day to keep me on the antibiotics I was getting through IV.

Wednesday he came in, and said that I was looking much better, my levels were up, and he was sending me home!!! I was so happy to go home to my kids, husband, and OWN bed!!! I’m glad they kept me as long as they did because my WBCC is still low. I have to be very careful about who comes to the house, and very careful about going out! But I am glad to be home!!!

My next chemo treatment is Friday the 22nd, and I am hoping that they can give me that medicine that helps with my WBCC not dropping so low! I can’t go through this after every treatment!! I am also hoping that my WBCC is high enough by then for me to be able to even have my treatment!!!!