Get Behind Me Satan!

I’m having a real hard time with things right now. I’m stressed, I’m worried, I’m confused, I’m just not myself.

This whole house buying thing is enough to give me a stroke. It seems as if stuff keeps coming up that results in moving our closing date further away. And if we don’t close in 9 more days…our contract is null and void. Then we have to start all over. I’m SO ready to have it done with so that I will quit worrying about if we are going to get it or not. UGGHH!!

The biggest issue I am having though is something that I have struggled with in the past. Things started to change this past year, and I could tell a difference in myself. Now I notice that I am starting to fall into the same person I was before. And I don’t like it.

I have been fasting since January 10th of this year. As I may have mentioned before, the Holy Spirit spoke to me one night as I was saying my prayers. Plain as day it said, “Fast until something happens.” How do I know it was the Holy Spirit, because there is no way that I would have come up with that on my own.

So I went from fasting anything with flour, to not eating things like bread, rolls, biscuits, doughnuts, bagels, pancakes, waffles, those type of things. I’ve been doing good with it. Almost 2 months later, and I am still fasting. The one thing that I have been praying for has not happened and I don’t intend on giving up until it does.

This is where my faith is starting to run thin. I know that God can do ANYthing, we just have to have faith. It’s only been 2 months, and my faith is starting to dwindle. I know that’s bad. REALLY bad, and I don’t want it to, but I don’t know what else to do but pray.

Because of this, I have also noticed that my fire for God is starting to dwindle as well. I am the secretary of our nursery committee, I help with the 4th and 5th graders on Wednesday night, and I ‘lead’ the 6th –12th grade drama ministry team. But Satan is starting to pull me away from these things little by little.

The youth pastor has decided to move drama practice to Wednesdays nights, which I will not be able to attend on most nights. My SIL is the nursery director, which means sometimes we tend to butt heads…more. And I have recently felt like I would rather stay home that go to church at all except for Sunday mornings!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!?!?

I can’t stand this! I want God in my life! I NEED God in my life. Why do I suddenly feel like life would be easier without Him?

At times like this I recall something that I was taught one summer at church camp. We were learning about the whole armor of God, and our teacher told us that even with all of that we still have to tell Satan to get behind us! So he had us recite, “Get Behind Me Satan!”

I may need to start reciting this more through out my day.