Comfort Healing

Issue: I suffer from boughts of panic attacks. Not very often, but at least once, sometimes twice a month. And though they don’t come that often, they still kick my booty.

Cause: I haven’t figured out what causes them completely. But I have noticed things that set them off.

1. If I am totally stressed.

2. If I have had something tragic happen.

3. If I have an unexplained sudden pain (in my chest, stomach, head, arm, leg, back…you get the idea!).

Symptoms: My stomach starts hurting, I start feeling all clammy, I get lightheaded, and I literally feel like I am going to die. I think that if I fall asleep, I’m never waking up.

Cures: Anything that helps me relax and/or get my mind off of things. I can read a good book or magazine, watch a funny movie, take a nice warm (not hot, that makes it worse), or sometimes I just MAKE myself go to sleep and turn things over to God.

Well last night, I felt one coming on. My stomach started hurting and I started feeling lightheaded. I was laying in bed with Sissy when this started and I told her that Mommy’s stomach hurt. My 3 year old had done something that my momma used to do when I was little and got a stomach ache. She rubbed my belly. Oddly, it helped. The thought of her comforting me the only way she knew how, calmed me enough that I could relax and go to sleep.

Oh how I love my little girl!!!

My NEW best friend!

I am a salt girl. Always have been.

In fact, when I was pregnant with Sissy, I ended up with pre-eclampsia because I ate so much salt! (Okay, well not quite, but that’s what I chalked it up to anyways.)  I suffered from horrible morning sickness and anything salted helped. Working next door to Mickey D’s didn’t help either. I would constantly be walking across the parking lot just to get an order of fries to settle my stomach. Or I would come in to work with TWO bags of sunflower seeds. Salt was my best friend.

3 years later, I still like to eat things that are salted, but not near as much. Now, I maybe eat MD’s only twice A MONTH!! I realize now that not only did it help my pocket book but probably my cholesterol as well!

A couple of weeks ago, we took the kids to see Hubby’s dad and stepmom. She had just cooked some supper before hand…fried chicken, potatoes, spinach, and chicken gravy. Of course, I am a huge chicken eater (odd seeing as I was raised on a chicken farm…)and I will try just about anything that has chicken in it! (Eggs, not so much. But chicken, yes!) Her fried chicken was delish! I asked her how she made it. She told me (like it was how everyone made chicken) that she simply dipped it in flour that had some seasoned salt, pepper, and some of this

in it! Mrs. Dash Table Blend. I am now addicted to this stuff! I bought a bottle of it shortly after, and I add it to everything I need seasoned. From chicken, to potatoes, to steak, and hamburger meat. It seems to have also made me eat a little healthier. I have made fried potatoes twice this week, but I have fried them in EVOO instead of vegetable oil, and used Mrs.. Dash instead of salt. And honestly…I think I liked them better than the other way.

I will definitely be buying more of this stuff in the future….I maybe even venture out and try some different blends. Not sure how adventurous I am though. Yep, Mrs. Dash is my NEW best friend. (Other than Stacy, RB, SA, and LR!!)

Easter and such..

So I’ve been a little self absorbed lately. Hubby was on vacation for 9 days this past week, and we truly enjoyed it.

We Hubby started remodeling the bathroom. He changed out all the hardware (cabinet door handles and knobs, towel racks, and toilet paper holder) the first day of his vacation.

On Tuesday, the 30th, we went out of town to Lowe’s to find some stuff for the house. (That is actually what started the whole remodel). We enjoyed spending time together as a family, not working on the house!

The rest of the week, we didn’t do much of anything, except Hubby worked on the bathroom.

Sunday was Easter (duh), and what I thought was going to be a miserable day turned out to be a quite nice day. Hubby and I fought for the previous 2 days, and Sunday morning, about where everyone was going to go to church and lunch. It was between his family’s church and house for lunch, of mine.

He was adamant about going with his family and was okay with splitting our family apart for the day…which I was NOT okay with. I gave in, in the end, and went to church with him and we did lunch with his family. As much as I thought the day was going to be horrible because of it, it was a fabulous time for us!

Hubby went back to work on Monday, and the kids about drove me crazy! I didn’t realize that Dad being home for 9 days would make the next day he went back miserable… me and the kids! They screamed and cried, and acted out all day!!

Today, thankfully, is last day of work before he is off for his 3 days. So far they have been doing good..so far.

Church is tonight, and tomorrow is MDO. Of course, Hubby is off tomorrow, so he will probably want the kids to stay home. We will see…

House Pics

Well, here it is! The house post!! Pictures of our new house before we bought it, and pictures of the house now. We are currently remodeling the master bathroom, so there will be updated pictures of it…at some point.

 

Living Room Before

Living Room After

Living Room Before

Living Room After

Living Room Before

Living Room After

Sissy’s Room Before

Sissy’s Room After

Sissy’s Room Before

Sissy’s Room After

Bubba’s Room Before

Bubba’s Room After

Bubba’s Room Before

Bubba’s Room After

Kitchen Before

Kitchen After

Dining Room Before

Dining Room After

And the creme’ de la creme’, the view out my back door!!

I know that I didn’t post all of the rooms, but I didn’t want to go to picture heavy in one post.

New House!!!!!

It’s been a little over a week since my last post, and I wondered, “Has anyone really even missed me?”

Then I realized, it doesn’t matter.

I apologize, but I did not start this blog for you. Does that sound bad??? I started it as a place to leave my thoughts, feelings, and memories. A place for me to look back and remember what and how I felt at a certain time in my life. If you happen to have started reading this blog and for some reason decided to follow it, awesome!

Okay, so I got a little off track….okay, a lot of track. I just felt that I needed to write all of that not for your benefit, but for mine. I sometimes get upset that I only have like 14 followers, and only like 2 or 3 of them leave comments…if any. I have to remind myself that I started this blog for me, not for your entertainment, though it helps, but for my memories.

So, back to why I actually started writing this post…

I have been MIA for the past week and a half because we have taken a very important step in our lives. We bought our first house!!! We found this house at the end of January, and after a month and a half, lots of stress, worry, stress, fears, stress, arguing, and did I mention stress, we finally got to close! We closed on Friday, March 12 and got the keys to the house Tuesday, March 16.

We headed over that evening with our bed, and paint supplies and got started with painting. When we finally called it quits, it was midnight and we had one coat on the living and dining room walls.  The next morning, we started up again with me painting and hubby bringing boxes over from the rent house. At around noon, my SIL and my bestie Stacy, came over and helped me paint. We got the rest of the living area and Jordie’s room knocked out before we called it quits at around 630 Wednesday night.

Thursday, I took the kids to MDO while Hubby went to work, and I went to the rent house to finish packing up some stuff and start cleaning. By Friday afternoon, the kids and drove away from the rent house for the last time. With so many emotions running through my head, it resulted in me weeping like a baby!!

Hubby has had his 3 days off yesterday, today, and tomorrow, and we have gotten quite a bit done at the new house. We still have quite a bit more to go though….

As soon as we get it all done, organized, and looking like a house, I will take, and post pictures for your viewing pleasure.

Don’t give up on me, I will be back….eventually!

Whatcha talkin ‘bout Willis??

Kelly did this post yesterday. It made me realize that being from Arkansas, a lot of people have no clue what we mean.

But it’s not only just Arkansas people, but people in general are different. Sometimes it does have to do with the region in which they are from, but sometimes not.

So it made me wonder…

This conversation is pretty much always taking place,

“I’m fixing to run to the store. Do ya’ll need anything?” “Yeah, a coke.”  “Okay. What kind?”  “Dr. Pepper.'” “A’ight.”

It also made me think of all the things that I can’t say. If you read this, and you know me in real life…which most of you do…next time you see me you will have to say all these for you. It doesn’t do it justice on here.

I can NOT say these words: Massachusetts, iron, oil, Vietnamese…there are probably more. And my high school best friend could definitely tell you what they are, She likes to make fun of me all the time for it!

I also tend to make up words. Krink is my big one. I have said it all my life, and can’t NOT say it. If I had enough people that read this blog, I would do a contest to see if any of you could guess what it means. But since I don’t, I’ll just tell you. It’s kink and crick combined. Like, “I have a KRINK in my neck". Yes, I said it all the time!!

So are there any words that you can’t say, have made up, say that people out of your region don’t understand or vice versa?

2 Degrees of Separation

I follow Jen over at First Comes Love, and she recently did this post.

It made me realize that I have never met anyone famous. But I am linked to quite a few by only 2 degrees of separation.

My godparents had some close friends, they may have actually been kin to each other some how or another,  that I knew quite well. They were at every function that we were it at. We even went to church together for years…she was my Sunday School teacher for awhile. Anyways, it turns out that Jake Lloyd aka Anakin Skywalker, is there GRANDSON!!

My mom used to work for DHS years ago. She helped families with disabled kids get into schools, and medical stuff, and other things that I am not quite sure of. The majority of her work involved making house calls. Once in awhile, she would let me go with her on one of these trips. I had a fascination  with Collin Raye at the time and my mom worked with a relative of his. So she took me to see her. I, of course, didn’t get to meet him.

I used to work with a girl at the pharmacy that used to talk about her niece in Hollywood. She once told us to watch Prison Break one particular evening because her niece was going to be on there. Now, years later, that niece is one of the most popular girls on Disney. No, not Miley Cyrus. Demi Lovato!

I also have a friend that has met many, many, MANY, country singers through her job in Nashville. Now, for some odd reason, she is moving back home. Away from Nashville, and all the stars…

So have you met anyone famous…or are you like me and have many 2 Degrees of Separation?

Scatterbrained

Things have been a little crazy around here lately. Okay, so maybe not so much as “around here’ as “in my head”.

In a single hour day, a million different things pass through my mind. Instead of writing a mile long post detailing every little thing, I will just give you a list.  Some things I might one day go into detail about, but tonight, I’ll keep it short and sweet.

1. We should be closing on our house tomorrow. Tomorrow is the close deadline, so I am stressing about what will happen if we DON’T close.
2. When/if we get the house, when are we going to have the time to clean and paint it before we start moving.
3. What colors are we going to paint each room.
4. How much help are we REALLY going to get to help us move. (You know you always will get tons of people that will tell you they will help, but will they really?)
5. Everything that I WANT for the house. (It’s going on our Housewarming registry…whenever that will be).
6. It took me an hour and a half to teach Sissy how to ride her bike the other day, but how long will she remember that.
7. Bubba’s 2nd birthday is in 4 months!
8. The last two also reminds me of how quick my two are growing up!
9. I turn 28 in a little over 2 months!
10. I have been fasting bread for a month, and though I still plan on continuing “until something happens”, it’s starting to get hard again to refrain from certain things…mmmm, doughnuts…
11. The little things my kids do through out the day that make my heart smile.
12. PW posted some stuff regarding her brother made me think of some family memories…this will have to be another post entirely!
13. I miss my besties!! The 3 of us have not ALL gotten together in what seems like forever! Really, it’s been since the end of January. I know this because it was at my house, as we were trying to get the house.
14. I need to start taking more pictures!! I’ve been slacking…just a wee bit!
15. I wonder if a rabbit would be a good pet for the kids….

Get Behind Me Satan!

I’m having a real hard time with things right now. I’m stressed, I’m worried, I’m confused, I’m just not myself.

This whole house buying thing is enough to give me a stroke. It seems as if stuff keeps coming up that results in moving our closing date further away. And if we don’t close in 9 more days…our contract is null and void. Then we have to start all over. I’m SO ready to have it done with so that I will quit worrying about if we are going to get it or not. UGGHH!!

The biggest issue I am having though is something that I have struggled with in the past. Things started to change this past year, and I could tell a difference in myself. Now I notice that I am starting to fall into the same person I was before. And I don’t like it.

I have been fasting since January 10th of this year. As I may have mentioned before, the Holy Spirit spoke to me one night as I was saying my prayers. Plain as day it said, “Fast until something happens.” How do I know it was the Holy Spirit, because there is no way that I would have come up with that on my own.

So I went from fasting anything with flour, to not eating things like bread, rolls, biscuits, doughnuts, bagels, pancakes, waffles, those type of things. I’ve been doing good with it. Almost 2 months later, and I am still fasting. The one thing that I have been praying for has not happened and I don’t intend on giving up until it does.

This is where my faith is starting to run thin. I know that God can do ANYthing, we just have to have faith. It’s only been 2 months, and my faith is starting to dwindle. I know that’s bad. REALLY bad, and I don’t want it to, but I don’t know what else to do but pray.

Because of this, I have also noticed that my fire for God is starting to dwindle as well. I am the secretary of our nursery committee, I help with the 4th and 5th graders on Wednesday night, and I ‘lead’ the 6th –12th grade drama ministry team. But Satan is starting to pull me away from these things little by little.

The youth pastor has decided to move drama practice to Wednesdays nights, which I will not be able to attend on most nights. My SIL is the nursery director, which means sometimes we tend to butt heads…more. And I have recently felt like I would rather stay home that go to church at all except for Sunday mornings!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!?!?

I can’t stand this! I want God in my life! I NEED God in my life. Why do I suddenly feel like life would be easier without Him?

At times like this I recall something that I was taught one summer at church camp. We were learning about the whole armor of God, and our teacher told us that even with all of that we still have to tell Satan to get behind us! So he had us recite, “Get Behind Me Satan!”

I may need to start reciting this more through out my day.

Thoughts…..

I realize that my posts are far and in between, but for my many one or two readers, I will let you in on a little secret…. I AM EXHAUSTED!!!

Someone in our house has been sick everyday for the past 2 months! No lie! I know this because I have been wanting to go see my Mamaw, who has ovarian cancer, for the past 2 months, but can’t because of one person or another being sick. After being in remission for a little over a year, she was told that it has returned. She wasn’t able to start chemo right off because of how weak she had been. They had every one really worried. She has now been able to start radiation, but still doesn’t need to be around anyone that is sick.

The kids had both gotten RSV, but at their age, there is nothing to do for it, except treat the symptoms. Once that went away, we think Bubba ended up with bronchiolitis. He got over that, just as Hubby got sick with the same junk…oh did I mention that I got it as well?? Well, we ALL got better, I was planning on going to see Mamaw this week, but then Sissy didn’t sleep good last night because of an upset stomach. This morning she woke up, still complaining of her stomach being upset, and then she started throwing up. What next??

I did manage to talk her into eating some french fries from Mickey D’s. After eating a handful of them, she looked at me and said, “Mmmm…..Momma, my belly not hurt anymore! These french fries make me all better!” I sure hope it stays that way, sweet girl, I would hate to see those come back up!

I believe we have set a closing date on our house, finally! March 8th, seems to be the go date. We could do it as early as March 3rd, but the seller can’t move his stuff out until the 8th. So we decided that instead of paying interest on the house, and us not living in it, and him being moved out, and us not being able to do anything to it because we haven’t closed on it, we decided that the 8th would be the best. For now. Our seller seems to be kinda strange….which is a nice way of putting it. It may change before then.

I am SO ready to get into our new house and be able to paint and do what ever we want to it so that it fits us!! The house is also about 400 more sq foot than the house we are renting now is. The kids are gonna have so much more room….not sure if that’s a good thing or not yet though.

So until next time…hope everyone has a good week!